Hot Mess Mom – Why You Need To Ditch This Label ASAP
Feel like you are a hot mess mom? Here’s why you need to ditch the hot mess mom identity and label forever.
Let’s talk a bit about hot mess mom culture and why I think we need to ditch labelling ourselves with this identity ASAP.
Do you think the hot mess mom culture is something to aspire to? Hopefully not!
A hot mess mom is defined as a relatable mom who totally does not have her life together.
Her mind feels totally frazzled and out of control.
She is disorganized and disheveled.
She is always tired and sleep-deprived.
Her kids and life feels as if they are outside of her control.
HOT MESS MOM
On some levels, we identify with this persona of a struggling mom who isn’t picture perfect.
The hot mess mom feels human and real to us.
So non-threatening in a way that makes us feel better about our own life.
In many ways it’s lovely to have these so-called hot-mess moms existing in our world, to remind us that hey, we are not alone when we are having a crappy day.
But is that something we should aspire to be?
Seriously, do we want to have that label of a hot-mess mom placed on us?
Even though on the other side of the continuum supposedly exists a flawless, perfect robot mom (but let’s be real, she doesn’t exist anyway except inside our minds), we actually have the option of settling somewhere in the middle.
I call this middle ground mom the “perfectly imperfect” parent.
She isn’t perfect…far from it.
But she isn’t totally at the whims of her outside environment either.
She is smart and wants to do her best.
She loves her kids even though they sometimes (or often) behave in a not-so-lovely manner.
She is relatable too because she is human.
She is me and you.
I don’t see the benefit of waking up every day and thinking to myself “oh my gosh I’m a hot-mess mom.”
Nope, that thought or label doesn’t serve me or you.
Thoughts that serve us are the ones that make us feel good about ourselves.
They make us feel good about our parenting and kids.
They make us feel confident that what we have to offer the world is good enough.
And I say good enough rather than perfect because PERFECTION DOESN’T EXIST.
HOT MESS MOM
When we decide that we are perfectly imperfect, we give ourselves permission to be imperfect.
It’s okay and normal to be a human with a human brain.
Perfectly imperfect moms sometimes yell.
They sometimes think thoughts that lead to frustration.
They sometimes have messy houses.
They sometimes set rules that they break the next day or the same hour.
They sometimes don’t care.
And they sometimes do care.
Sometimes both at the same time.
You aren’t a mess and you certainly aren’t a HOT mess mom.
Ditch this label ASAP.
Instead you are exactly who you are supposed to be.
A human who is also a mom, simply doing the best she can in this world with the tools and resources at her disposal.
Perfectly imperfect.
Much love,
Frances Vidakovic
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I’m Frances Vidakovic – a mindset & action coach for quietly ambitious women who want to stop overthinking and finally take aligned action. I help women achieve their goals and follow through on what matters, without sacrificing their sanity or soul.