OVERLY CRITICAL FAMILY

 

 

Overly Critical – 4 Ways To Deal With Over-Critical Family Members

Are you dealing with overly critical family? Here are 4 ways to deal with overly critical people without sacrificing your sanity. 

 

 

Let’s chat about overly critical family members.

Ah, the critics…If you have an overly critical family then you will know that they aren’t the best of fun.

For starters, they don’t bring out the best in you (no way). Also, when they throw negative comments your way, you really have no idea how to handle those comments appropriately…

 

Now for the good news…it is indeed possible to handle critical comments from family members WITHOUT it turning into an argument.

 

Remember, you’re in control of your responses to their comments.

You get to decide how you want to cope with these people.

 

It’s time to try these techniques to resolve critical criticisms without any arguments or angry feelings (good luck!):

 

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TIP # 1 – Avoid taking it personally.

 

Let’s start here. It’s super easy to get defensive and take things personally when criticism is being thrown your way.

 

  • For example, when a family member judges your weight or appearance, it’s hard not to take it personally.

 

  • You probably feel like you’re being attacked and vulnerable, but the key is to remember that their opinion isn’t the only one that matters. What you think about yourself MATTERS MORE.

 

  • Keep in mind that comments about you actually show more about the state of mind of the person saying them. When they’re criticizing your appearance, it’s possible they have issues with their own looks.

 

  • Family members sometimes attack others because it’s an easy target for them and it takes the focus off of their own shortcomings. But we all know the truth. Genuinely happy people don’t feel the need to attack others on a regular basis.

 

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TIP # 2 – Know your triggers.

 

 

Triggers are things that have the potential to set you off.

They might include things like comments or actions that affect you deeply.

Do you recognize the things that trigger you?

What sets YOU off?

By becoming aware of your triggers, you can learn to notice when others are “pushing your buttons” and consciously calm yourself to tone down your reaction.

 

  • For example, weight issues are a common cause of concern, so negative comments about your weight might be a trigger. They can trigger a cascade of negative emotions such as feeling worthless, hopeless, or like a failure.

 

  • Family members are usually aware of your triggers, so they know how to hurt you easily. It’s important to avoid letting them have this power over you. Once you know what your triggers are, you can choose what to do when these feelings start to rise for you.

 

 

 

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TIP # 3 – Share how you feel.

 

In some cases, your family may not even be aware that they’re hurting you.

Could that be the case for you?

They may even think that they’re actually helping by pointing out your faults (seriously) so you can work to overcome them.

Crazy, right but to some people this makes logical sense.

 

  • To nip this in the bud, share your feelings with your family and let them know that their negative comments are painful to hear.

 

  • Explain that you’re aware of your issues and don’t need the constant negative reminders. It’s up to you to make them aware that they’re not helping so they have the potential to change.

 

 

OVERLY CRITICAL FAMILY

 

 

OVERLY CRITICAL FAMILY

TIP # 4 – Set clear boundaries.

 

Here’s the thing: when it comes to setting boundaries you actually TEACH others how to treat you.

You let them know through your words and actions what is and isn’t acceptable. So let your family members know that you won’t accept some things.

They will eventually get used to you standing up for yourself when you demonstrate through example that you aren’t willing to take crap.

 

 

  • Be prepared to take action if they overstep these boundaries. In this case, you may have to cut off contact with them (not ideal but it happens) or take other measures to let them know that you’re serious about the boundaries.

 

  • It doesn’t need to be forever but until they understand about respecting those boundaries you have set.

 

  • Remember you can’t control everyone, but you can make it clear that you won’t tolerate rude or negative comments. Set your boundaries and make sure they are clear to others.

 

  • Finally, although you may feel obligated to spend time with your family, you don’t have to spend time with people who hurt you on a regular basis.

 

  • You deserve to be treated well, even by your family members. Just because they are family doesn’t give them permission to treat you like that.

 

 

OVERLY CRITICAL FAMILY

 

 

So, if your family is constantly sharing negative comments or criticisms, it’s up to you to learn how to deal with them.

 

I know it’s not an easy process, but it’s important for your sanity and well-being to manage your emotions and their comments.

Take ownership of your emotions and your boundaries and understand that even if your family is critical, you can still show up with love, compassion and understanding and not take it all so personally.

 

 

 

Before You Go…

 

  • Grab your free gift: How To Stop Self-Sabotaging Yourself Guide (4 steps to finally get out of your own way) CLICK HERE
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