The Lies We Tell Ourselves – 7 Lies You Need To Stop Saying!
Want to know more about the lies we tell ourselves? Here are 7 lies you need to ditch today so you can actually succeed in life.
Let’s chat about the lies we tell ourselves.
We all know that lying isn’t a nice thing to do but it is amazing how often we lie to ourselves on a daily basis.
These lies are said almost to protect us, cover up our perceived shortcomings and prevent us from taking risks.
Deep down we might think that these lies are serving us but ultimately, these lies limit our lives and our ability to enjoy life fully.
In the end, our lies serve the purpose of making us feel better in the short-term but…and here’s a big but….
You may not even be aware of the lies you tell yourself.
It’s time to start telling yourself the truth instead which will serve you better in the long run.
Here’s how you can avoid lying to yourself and start living:
THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
1 – “I don’t have a choice.”
Ah yes you do!
We all actually have an unlimited number of options available to us at any time.
We get to choose our thoughts, choose our feelings and choose our actions, all which impact the results we have in our life
You might not feel brave or capable enough to consider them all, but even still, you do always have options.
You have the option to stay scared, the option to stay small or the option to play big and be brave.
Consider what advice you would give a friend in a similar situation.
Or determine what your most capable friend would do.
What would they do in the same situation and can you do the same?
THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
2 – “If I do X or say Y, people will think less of me.”
This is a lie that we tell ourselves that keeps us stuck.
The truth is we don’t know what anyone will think.
They might secretly be envious of you.
They may think you are a total legend for trying.
Or – and I know this one is hard to believe – but they might not care one iota about anything you are doing each day.
The truth is everyone is too preoccupied with their own lives or else wondering what your opinion is of them.
- If you believe you’re worthy, you won’t have these types of thoughts. You won’t even CARE what anyone else think of you. You’re good enough and worthy enough to do and say what you want.
THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
3 – “It’s too late for me.”
If you take only one thing away from reading this blog post I want it to be this – IT’S NEVER TOO LATE FOR YOU.
People have graduated from medical school in their 60’s. An 80-year-old has successfully climbed Mount Everest.
Do you still think it’s too late?
Are you assuming you can only do things by a particular age?
Do you know that there are older people doing amazing things right now that don’t feel limited by their age or circumstances?
- Sure, many things become less convenient as we get older. For example, it’s more challenging to go back to school when you have a family and a full-time job compared to a single, 20-year old.
- But challenging and impossible are completely different. That does not mean it can’t be done! Anything is possible when you put your mind to it!
THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
4 – “Anything short of perfect is failure.”
Sorry I hate to break this to you but there is no such thing as perfect.
So, if you are striving for it, you will always be sorely disappointed.
If you have to be the best at something before you’ll try, you’ll never get off the couch.
Easy solution to this: stop thinking you have to do things perfectly!
Most of us don’t have the potential to be the best at anything, but we can all be pretty good at just about anything But ONLY IF WE TRY.
Yes, it requires time and effort – both of which you have at your disposal.
- Another great question to ask yourself: Do you really need to be the best? And if so WHY?
- Setting yourself up to meet unrealistic expectation is another sign of feeling unworthy. There’s no reason to be competitive with everything you do.
- Enjoy yourself and JUST DO YOUR BEST without worrying about how well you’re doing.
THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
5 – “I’d be happy if I had more money.”
So many people think this is true but studies have shown that happiness and income are only correlated up to a salary of roughly $70,000 per year.
That means that millionaires are no happier than those that make $70,000 annually. If you can pay your bills each month, money isn’t limiting your happiness.
Plus have you ever met a person who has little money but is sincerely, genuinely happy. I HAVE!
That’s how I know that happiness isn’t connected to outside influences but a feeling you nurture inside of you.
THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
6 – “I can change him (or her).”
Mmmm I wish I could say this is true but it is unlikely.
Think about how hard is to change yourself, even when you want to change.
Now imagine how difficult it is to change someone else.
And that other person probably doesn’t want to change.
It isn’t going to happen, if you are forcing or expecting it to happen and they themselves HAVE NO DESIRE TO CHANGE.
- A better strategy is to learn to accept others as they are. What would it be like just to love them for who they are?
- If something about them is too disagreeable, it’s okay to set some appropriate boundaries but to expect them to change just so you can be happy and feel more comfortable around them is unrealistic and not necessary.
- You get to decide what you think about any person in this world. You can just decide to love them flaws and all.
THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
7 – “I’m limited in my ability to accomplish anything.”
It has been said that learning to walk and talk are far more challenging than anything else anyone has ever accomplished.
So if you have managed to do that, then everything else is easy in comparison.
You’re probably saying to yourself, “Well, everyone can walk and talk.”
Exactly.
You’re infinitely more capable than you need to be.
- You may have a few issues to resolve – usually your mindset and your belief in your ability, but your inherent capability isn’t one of them. Don’t let your thoughts hold you back.
- What would you do if you didn’t let fear hold you back? What would you do if you were 100% certain you would succeed?
THE LIES WE TELL OURSELVES
In the end, we are masters at telling ourselves little or big white lies and deluding ourselves.
But here’s the thing: we lie to the person in the mirror in order to protect ourselves – to make us feel better but in the end, it only makes you feel WORSE.
So, avoid giving up your future in order to appease your emotions in the short-term.
It could be argued that the purpose of all self-help is to learn how to lie to ourselves less frequently.
I think this could be true.
Awareness is the first step.
What would it be like if you stopped telling yourself these lies today?
Much love and best of luck xxx
-
Before You Go…
– See my EVERYTHING PAGE and grab a free gift > HERE
– Get instant access to EVERY COURSE I’ve ever created > HERE
– Listen to my INSPIRING LIFE PODCAST on Spotify or via Apple Podcasts.
– Or for biz owners, listen to LIFE COACH FOR BIZ MOMS Podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.
I’m Frances Vidakovic – a mindset & action coach for quietly ambitious women who want to stop overthinking and finally take aligned action. I help women achieve their goals and follow through on what matters, without sacrificing their sanity or soul.