THE ONE THING OTHER MOMS WEREN’T LYING ABOUT
It turns out other moms weren’t lying when they warned me:
“Enjoy every minute… those years will pass quickly.”
“And once they’re gone, you’ll wish you could have them back.”
For the longest time, I thought these women were slightly delusional.
Back when my kids were babies and toddlers, NOTHING felt quick.
A single day felt like a week.
A week felt like a month.
And every evening I collapsed into bed wondering how on earth I was meant to do this again tomorrow.
The whining.
The tears.
The constant following.
The never-ending need for attention.
I remember thinking:
“Miss these parts? Never. Not in a million years.”
But lo and behold… they were right.
Somewhere between then and now, time folded in on itself.
My babies grew.
Their faces changed.
Their voices deepened.
In what felt like a blink, they transformed into the young adults now standing in front of me.
Now, when I see a young mom pushing a pram down the street, my mind goes blank.
Was I really once one of them?
Was I really that young?
And why can’t I remember my kids being that small?
It’s like those early years have been partially wiped from my memory – as if they belonged to a different lifetime entirely.
But the evidence exists: in photos, in old videos, in the sudden flash of a moment that resurfaces out of nowhere.
One of those moments happened when my son was eleven.
It was our last day of a holiday in Europe. He was sad that the trip was ending, and he turned to me and said something that stopped me in my tracks:
“What if life is like this?
You think you have enough time to do everything you want…
But then you get to the end and realise it’s all over.”
Goosebumps.
Because he was right.
Life is short.
And one day, it will be over.
None of us gets to stay forever.
I reassured him that he had nothing to worry about for now…
and then I blinked, and many more years passed.
This is what happens.
Our kids grow.
They learn from the world.
They develop their own opinions.
The umbilical cord stretches… and eventually drops from their hands altogether.
You know in theory that this is normal – babies grow into kids, kids grow into teens, teens prepare to leave the nest.
But the practice is harder than the theory.
Because even though you’re proud of them… even though you want them to fly…
there’s a part of you that aches for the days when all they wanted was to crawl into your bed and hold you tight.
Back when you were their entire world.
You don’t realise how much you’ll miss it… until suddenly you do.
And then comes the next shock:
The realisation that the next stop for your teens is adulthood.
Your little babies morphing into young adults.
How did that happen so fast?
How are you old enough for this when you still feel so young inside?
To every mom still in the thick of early motherhood, here is the advice I wish someone had whispered to me:
• You don’t have to be perfect.
Every mom thinks she’s doing it wrong.
Every mom doubts herself.
Every mom worries she’s messing up.
But you are the exact mother your child was meant to have.
You were paired together for a reason.
Your flaws don’t disqualify you – they humanise you.
• Your best is always enough.
Some days you’ll be tired, overwhelmed, impatient, grumpy.
That doesn’t make you a bad mom – it makes you a human one.
Just do your best.
On the good days and the messy ones.
That is enough.
• The things you’re stressing about? They matter less than you think.
Sleeping through the night.
Toilet training.
Walking.
Talking.
Reading.
Comparing milestones.
In the grand scheme of life… these things sort themselves out.
Every child gets there in their own time.
• And even if things don’t go to plan, you will still be okay – more than okay.
My son was diagnosed with a degenerative neuromuscular disease at age three.
Wheelchair-bound by age six.
I never imagined that something so devastating could also shape our lives with such depth, resilience, compassion, and unexpected joy.
Life is not always easy…
But you are stronger than you think.
Stronger than you will ever give yourself credit for.
Things to let go of:
- Mom guilt.
- Comparing.
- Perfectionism.
- Blame.
- Needing to do everything.
- Needing to be everything.
- Believing happiness comes from outside yourself.
Things to embrace:
- Your kids’ quirks.
- The ups and downs.
- A little mess.
- A lot of grace.
- Forgiveness.
- Compassion.
- Self-care (because you matter too – deeply).
As confronting as it may be to realise that time has slipped through your fingers… there is a beautiful upside to this wake-up call:
You realise life is precious.
You realise every moment counts.
You begin living more intentionally, loving more deeply, choosing more wisely.
You stop taking the ordinary days for granted.
When I look at my kids now, I think:
“I will never get this moment with them again.”
Even if it’s not perfect.
Even if I’m stretched thin.
Even if it’s messy, chaotic, or emotional.
This moment – right here – is the only one guaranteed.
There’s no pause button.
No rewind.
No chance to revisit what we took for granted.
And the saddest cliché of all?
We only realise how lucky we were… once that season is gone.
Don’t let that be you.
Your life is happening now.
Your kids are who they are today only once.
Press play – and don’t miss it.
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I’m Frances Vidakovic – a mindset & action coach for quietly ambitious women who want to stop overthinking and finally take aligned action.
In a nutshell, I help women achieve their goals and follow through on what matters, without sacrificing their sanity or soul.
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With love,
Frances xx
I’m Frances Vidakovic – a mindset & action coach for quietly ambitious women who want to stop overthinking and finally take aligned action. I help women achieve their goals and follow through on what matters, without sacrificing their sanity or soul.