How To Let Go Of The Past – 7 Ways To Quickly Detach
Want to know how to let go of the past? Here are 7 ways to detach yourself from the past so you can finally leave it behind.
\
Let’s chat about how to let go of the past.
If you have had a difficult past then you will understand how difficult it is to shrug it off your shoulders.
But how long do you carry the past with you? Do you want to forever be angry at your parents for not being loving enough when you were a child?
Do you want to forever fume at a friend who did you wrong back in the ninth grade?
As they say, “Pain is guaranteed, but suffering is optional.”
Yes crappy experiences are painful, but they are part of life.
Suffering for years is your own doing and your own choice.
Remember you have to consciously choose to continue to feel bad about experiences that happened years ago.
It’s definitely a skill, just not a productive one. You can indeed let go of the past if it is holding you back in life.
Letting go of the past allows for more possibilities in the future.
Here are 7 ways how to let go of the past:
HOW TO LET GO OF THE PAST
TIP # 1 – Avoid rehashing the past.
The best way to allow a negative past experience to encroach on your present or future is to spend time thinking about it.
You might try to convince yourself that playing the incident over and over in your mind is cathartic or educational.
It’s not.
Learn what you can immediately after the negative experience and then move on.
- The more mental energy you give to the past, the more it impacts the remainder of your life.
We are products of our past, but we don’t have to be prisoners of it. Rick Warren
The past can’t hurt you anymore, not unless you let it. Alan Moore.
Who controls the past controls the future: who controls the present controls the past. George Orwell.
HOW TO LET GO OF THE PAST
TIP # 2 – Create new memories.
An effective way to unseat old memories is to create new memories.
If you want to get over your ex, find someone new.
Be active with your life.
Join a club, make new friends, spend time doing something new, create new memories here and now, memories that make you happy and are aligned with your current passion and purpose in life.
You are not a child anymore.
As an adult you have the ability and freedom to make new choices.
Make your new experiences so positive that the new memories overpower the old, past memories.
No matter what happened to you in your past, you are not your past, you are the resources and the capabilities you glean from it. And that is the basis for all change. Jordan Belfort
Your past doesn’t define who you are. It just gives you the starting point for who you’re going to be. Agent Carolina
The only thing standing between you and your goal is the bullshit story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it. Jordan Belfort
HOW TO LET GO OF THE PAST
TIP # 3 – Make a conscious decision to let go of your past.
You need to consciously say this to yourself.
The past can longer hurt me.
I am choosing to let it go.
If whatever you’re doing isn’t working STOP DOING IT.
Make a conscious decision to do something about the challenge you’re facing.
Just because the past taps you on the shoulders, doesn’t mean you have to look back.
Some of the best lessons we ever learn are learned from past mistakes. The error of the past is the wisdom and success of the future. Dale Turner
I have learned that if you must leave a place that you have lived in and loved and where all your yesteryears are buried deep, leave it anyway except a slow way, leave it the fastest way you can. Never turn back and never believe that an hour you remember is a better hour because it is dead. Passed years seem safe ones, vanquished ones, while the future lives in a cloud, formidable from a distance. Beryl Markham
Forgiving does not erase the bitter past. A healed memory is not a deleted memory. Instead, forgiving what we cannot forget creates a new way to remember. We change the memory of our past into a hope for our future. Lewis B. Smedes
HOW TO LET GO OF THE PAST
TIP # 4 – Make plans.
You also need to make a few plans for your future if you want to move on from the past.
Have something exciting that lies ahead of you in the future that prevents you from non-stop looking back.
A compelling future can be the best medicine for a messy past.
What would you like to do in the next year?
Dwelling on the past only blinds you to the future. Andrew Boyd
The past should be a springboard, not a hammock. Ivern Ball
Your past is important, but it is not nearly as important to your present as the way you see your future. Tony Campolo
HOW TO LET GO OF THE PAST
TIP # 5 – Spend more time in the present moment.
Mindfulness has been touted as a solution for nearly every psychological condition under the sun.
Mindfulness helps us let go of the past and eradicate needless worry and stress because right now, here in this present moment, while you take another deep breath EVERYTHING IS FINE.
You can and will cope with things in your life when you remember to stay present.
Dealing with the past is an ideal application for mindfulness.
At its core, living more mindfully and intentionally is about determining your values, and then using those values to define goals for your life.
Being mindful is the art of making your own choices before other people’s choices make us.
- Mindfulness is simple, but not easy. You just need to remember to do it. For this purpose, simply pay attention to your environment and your current activity. The present moment is filled with joy and happiness and if you are mindful, you will see it.
- If you’re walking your dog, you’re paying attention to what you see. Your thoughts shouldn’t be on your ex-husband, the broken hot-water heater, or the report that’s due tomorrow. It should be on the present moment. Wherever you are, be there fully present.
- Mindfulness takes a lot of practice to do well, but the time is well-spent. Your calm mind is the ultimate weapon against your challenge so do your best to relax.
HOW TO LET GO OF THE PAST
TIP # 6 – Avoid blaming others.
I know, I know, blaming is convenient.
When you blame others for your problems, you let yourself off the hook for any responsibility in the matter.
Only problem with that is the animosity you feel toward others regarding your past keeps the past fresh in your mind.
You will need to forgive everyone involved in your past and let go of your negative feelings in order to move forward.
Because when you blame and criticize others for things that have occurred, you are avoiding responsibility.
You forget that you are responsible for your feelings.
It’s always easy to blame others and you can spend your entire life blaming the world, but your successes and failures are entirely your own responsibility.
When you blame others, you give up your power to change.
When you think everything is someone else’s fault, the suffering you feel won’t go away.
You need to realize that everything springs from YOU – your feelings about the world, your feelings about your ability to control your life and your ability to change.
If terrible things happened to you, it is what it is.
What can you learn from those experiences?
What strength did you gain from the past?
How have you proven yourself to be more resilient and compassionate thanks to these experiences?
Take back your control because you are in the driver’s seat in your life my friend.
We go to the past to lay the blame – since the past can’t argue. Glen Duncan
My past has not defined me, destroyed me, deterred me, or defeated me; it has only strengthened me. Steve Maraboli
Whatever we think of the past, we must not be prisoners to it. Barack Obama
HOW TO LET GO OF THE PAST
TIP # 7 – Seek out peace.
When you’re upset about the past, seek peace in your body.
Breathe slowly and deeply.
Allow the past to flow out of your body with each breath.
Keep going until the negative feeling is gone.
You will know that you are in the right place when you can think about the past and feel peaceful without feeling any anger, rage or stress.
Always look at what you have left. Never look at what you have lost. Robert H. Schuller
We can draw lessons from the past, but we cannot live in it. Lyndon B. Johnson
Events in the past may be roughly divided into those which probably never happened and those which do not matter. William Ralph Inge
HOW TO LET GO OF THE PAST
In the end, you need to learn how to detach yourself from your past negative experiences in order to move on in life.
Are you suffering because of the past?
Why?
Why are you treating yourself that way?
It’s true that sometimes things in life don’t work out, but that doesn’t mean they have to influence you negatively for the rest of your life.
Forgive those that have wronged you in the past.
Forgive yourself.
Look forward to the future and see the exciting things that can lie ahead.
The measure of your success will be your future happiness and peace of mind.
Be selective with your battles and don’t dwell on your past.
Sometimes peace is better than being right and you deserve a loving, peaceful life.
Before You Go…
– See my EVERYTHING PAGE and grab a free gift > HERE
– Get instant access to EVERY COURSE I’ve ever created > HERE
– Listen to my INSPIRING LIFE PODCAST on Spotify or via Apple Podcasts.
– Or for biz owners, listen to LIFE COACH FOR BIZ MOMS Podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.
I’m Frances Vidakovic – a mindset & action coach for quietly ambitious women who want to stop overthinking and finally take aligned action. I help women achieve their goals and follow through on what matters, without sacrificing their sanity or soul.