Reserved Personality – 5 Tips To Help Introverts Be More Social

Do you have a reserved personality? No worries! Here are 5 tips to help shy introverts be more social today.

Let’s chat about kids and teens who have a reserved personality.

Does your child have difficulties with social interactions and activities?

Is he or she a little shyer and quieter than most?

Did you know that you can help them by gently encouraging them to get involved?

Yes, even if they’re naturally shy, learning social skills from a young age will benefit them for the rest of their life.

You can start by considering these helpful tips:

RESERVED PERSONALITY IN KIDS

TIP # 1 – Recognize the different types of introverted children.

Here’s the thing about kids – they weren’t all born with a super large dose of bubbly confidence.

Just like adults, they are instead born with their own unique personality which will fall somewhere on the spectrum of introverted to extroverted.

And that is totally okay!

It is also helpful to know that introverted children don’t fall into simple categories, and their personalities can vary greatly.

• It’s easy to clump all introverted children under the category of shy kids. However, this doesn’t apply to all children who are introverted. They may avoid social interactions because of bad experiences or abuse.

• They may also prefer to be alone and find joy in solitude. They are all different due to various personal reasons and it is important to note why they are the way they are.

• Sometimes they are perfectly introverted, the way they were born to be. There is nothing there to worry about or try to change.

• Introverts generally don’t always express their feelings and thoughts. This makes it more difficult to understand why they don’t want to participate in an activity. But you can still ask and respectfully listen to their answer. It doesn’t mean that there is anything wrong with them if they are naturally shyer.

• Introverts may have different views on social activities compared to extroverts. They may not crave the same social interaction. They may be totally happy to fill their cup of love while they are alone at home.

RESERVED PERSONALITY IN KIDS

TIP # 2 – Avoid anger and frustration.

You may feel that your child is missing out on fun events and being left behind if they veer on the side of introversion.

You may also worry about your child’s development.

But I promise you, anger and frustration aren’t the answers.

• It’s important to approach an introverted child in a gentle and caring manner. Avoid arguing, yelling, or forcing your child into stressful social situations.

• Your anger won’t encourage the child and could scare them. I didn’t learn this myself until later in life, when I started to crave more alone time that introverted people can be totally happy on their own!

• Your anger can also make the child shut down and stop listening to you. I mean, is there really a reason to get super angry at them for having a different way of filling their cup of love.

• I love this analogy the most when it comes to understanding introversion because introverts like to fill their cup when they are alone, spending time quietly while extroverts fill their cup by spending time with others.

• Introverts also don’t enjoy conflict, so you want to avoid aggressive or pushy conversations if you are exploring this idea of your child doing more outside with friends.

• Instead, talk about your concerns in a calm manner and make suggestions. You are having these conversations because you genuinely love and want the best for your kids. And sometimes what they want and what you want may differ.

RESERVED PERSONALITY IN KIDS

TIP # 3 – Listen and make recommendations.

Your child may have multiple explanations for why they don’t want to participate in a particular activity.

Please, I recommend that you listen to their reasons with an open and non-judgmental heart, and then make suggestions that your child will find realistic and reasonable.

They absolutely need to feel comfortable with your ideas.

• For example, instead of forcing them to attend a large party with 50 friends, consider asking your child to attend a smaller get-together with family. Familiar faces and circumstances may be easier for them to accept.

RESERVED PERSONALITY IN KIDS

TIP # 4 – Learn to accept the introversion.

Your child’s personality isn’t going to change any time soon with bullying or anger.

In fact, your pressure for them to change who they inherently are can even make things worse.

This is why it’s important to accept the introversion and learn to work within its boundaries.

They can still participate in social activities, but on their terms, in ways in which they feel comfortable.

• If your child doesn’t want to attend a party or event, let it be. Yes, I promise you all may still be okay. Instead, try to find social activities that an introvert can enjoy.

• This may include smaller gatherings or other activities. Ask them, what do they actually want to do? What do they enjoy doing without being forced? Dig deep.

RESERVED PERSONALITY IN KIDS

TIP # 5 – Use technology.

Technology can help an introverted child communicate and reach out to new friends.

Aren’t we so lucky to have access to technology in this modern world?

You can still monitor their activities to ensure their technology use is safe and age-appropriate but learn to use technology to their advantage.

• You may discover that they love exploring various activities with Smartphones, computers, and tablets.

• Technology can also help you communicate with your child on a daily basis. Children may feel more comfortable texting you or emailing you their thoughts and ideas. You may find they have a lot more to say via technology.

All in all, it is perfectly normal for an introverted child to try to avoid social activities and other people, if they aren’t feeling comfortable.

Nevertheless, you can get involved without being too pushy and help them learn the vital skills of interacting with others.

The real question is what would make them feel more comfortable?

What will encourage them to come out of their shell?

These are great questions to ask as long as you keep in mind that they may feel totally happy and safe in this shell of theirs and it may take more time and gentle love to coax them out of it.

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Frances Vidakovic

I’m Frances Vidakovic – a mindset & action coach for quietly ambitious women who want to stop overthinking and finally take aligned action. I help women achieve their goals and follow through on what matters, without sacrificing their sanity or soul.